no news is good news, great g-parents & job hunting

nothing much new here to report. chicka is learning new things everyday [like an officially 11 mo old should]. she can sign "eat", "hot" and she points to her palms which I still have NO IDEA what it means. she does it all the time and looks me square in the eye as she does it to say "see?". i never taught her anything like it so i'm stumped. she must be modifying another sign! sorry chicka.

made some caramel corn for the first time... YUM

 

baby loves her bath

few pics of bubble fun

"wearing" momma's sunglasses

bath time in the sink at "neece's"

 

papa chicka's grandparents came to visit his aunt and uncle that live near hutch last weekend. i think they really enjoyed seeing chicka without everyone else hovering. we also went to the last day of the fair before it got too hot out. it was really nice to see them without traveling back 8 [with stops] hours to our native land. they also brought chicka's 1st bday present. eek. giving of the first bday present put it into reality. my thought was, if i wished it to go away or "forgot" about it, chicka would never EVER turn one. sigh. luckily, its still 1 month [-6 days] away...

money sucks. can't we go back to trading? i need to find a part-time gig. i've tried target, michaels, wal-mart, starbucks and dillions. nothing. i must be either overqualified or there aren't any openings. i can't find any evening/weekend jobs. i'm not willing to put chicka into a daycare because i literally had a meltdown [including panic attack + hyperventilation] when i thought of dropping her off somewhere... alone... without me. granted, she does need some momma-less time just as much as i need chicka-less time but we don't know anyone nor can i even bring the idea into my head of trusting anyone with her. i never thought i would feel this way about it. 

when i first found out i was pregnant i had FULL plans on going back to work but when my income just barely paid for daycare, it just didn't add up. why would i work just to pay someone to watch little chicka? since i wasn't even in my field of education it was pointless. after the decision was made for me to stay home. then expenses came... 

over halfway through my pregnancy 7 hospital stays with a $200 co-pay a day and at least 3-4 days per stay, bed rest at 32 weeks [meaning short-term leave WITHOUT pay because i hadn't been working there a year yet], a c-section, emergency kidney/ureter surgery (twice once to put ureter stints in and once to separate the fused ureter to my uterus), constant $40 co-pays to see the special urologist for follow-ups. when  it was all said and done little chicka and i had racked up quite a bill! 

we are slowly paying the hospital bills off and we have been trying to be good and stay on a tight budget but when those darn bills are due [and might i add why are they all due at the same time?] it just doesn't add up and for a week or two we can't even buy the essentials. i pray that chicka doesn't run out of diapers, or for us, toilet paper. if we do need something, out comes the credit card. granted we don't have a huge bill on that becuase we immediately pay it off when dada gets paid. infact, i don't own a credit card because i'm afraid of what i might do with it. cha-ching, cha-ching... it just really sucks when i see something i know chicka would love or the fact that my pre-pregnancy wardrobe still doesn't fit [i long for a shirt that doesn't show my muffin top] and i can't buy it. i know money can't buy love, thank goodness for that. i just really wish we would have to stop holding our breaths and crossing our fingers right before payday when the money runs out.

lemme know if any of you moms know anything legit or good because i need help! i'm a hard worker and will NOT let you down.

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

dress-up, blowing kisses, self-feeding & teeth, where for art thou?

this last week we played dress-up with momma chicka's baby clothes! here is a few pics.

collage of the day

a few picniks

whew, pictures out of the way. chicka has FINALLY learned to blow a kiss! no video of it yet... weeks i have tried to get her to do it and my mom tries ONE time and BAM, she gets it. happy but grrrr... [its like when you try to get a lid off and then someone comes along and makes you look like a dumba**.

chicka has learned to self-feed, a little! i'm so proud. here's a video for you! WARNING: turn down you speakers! i tend to squeal right into the microphone, i'm sorry.

ps- [yes, blue's clues is in the background on netflix. normally, i don't let her watch tv but she was beyond tired, cranky and i needed her to eat] earlier, breakfast did not go over very well and couldn't get her to sit in her highchair for more than 3 minutes. meaning, a whole bowl of hard earned breast milk cereal went down the sink... sad day. i hate wasting breast milk since i work so hard to keep my supply up!

at 8.5 months i finally got my wish, chicka got her first tooth, followed by another a half a week later. then... nothing. where are you stubborn pearly whites? my chicka will be 1 year [yes, i'm in denial] next month and all she got for "christmas" was her two bottom teeth! she wants to eat what we eat but most of the time ends up spitting it out because she can't chew. i'm afraid underneath those volcanic gums is 4 or 5 hot lava teeth about ready to "blow" all at once and it BETTER NOT be around her birthday! what a sad day that would be if poor little pink pirate [that's her theme] chicka was a big mess of teething insanity!

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

standing from crawling, bravery & procrastination

little chicka was naked in the bathtub trying to crawl around when she got her leg caught underneath her. not wanting to sit down but couldn't quite get crawling, she decided she would stand! i just stood there in awe. something i was hoping she would do for a long time and she just *poof*, did it. like it was no big deal. it never ceases to amaze me. now hopefully instead of falling on her butt and either crawling to the nearest object [usually me] or sitting there crying for me to help her up, she can stand up by herself. i'm starting to go from being explosively overjoyed that she is becoming more independent to being bittersweet, almost sad, that my little chicka is needing me less and less. never thought i say that. when chicka was a newborn i prayed and dreamed for when she could play for ten minutes by herself while i ate my breakfast. now sometimes i can eat my breakfast and drink my coffee, all in one sitting!

    

  running around after a bath,pjs strategically placed                getting caught messing with the blinds                                                                                       

i'm currently helping chicka's aunt with her cake business designing fliers, pamphlets, logos and stuff. she gave me the idea to put an add, either craigslist or newspaper or somewhere to help small businesses with their advertisements. since i majored in art, it got me thinking. i would LOVE, LOVE, [did i mention i would LOVE?] to do this. two problems: i have no idea how to do my own business & i can't muster up the courage to do it! send me bravery vibes!

giving me some raspberries

why am i the worst at procrastinating. i sat here tonight working on my two church websites i volunteer to update and think, "why didn't i do this last weekend when i had the time?". i reply to myself [scary, i know] "it's because you work well under a deadline, you would rather spend time with your family and its how you're programed." i have ALWAYS been a procrastinator. i've tried, without success, to do things ahead of schedule. i fall back into the old habits after a week or so. i've longed to have that crazy gene where you HAVE to do things early and don't put off things til tomorrow.  isn't there some daily pill or vaccine i can take? i already feel like my stomach is a walking pharmacy. what's another pill in the old breadbasket? maybe the people who working on the gene that causes procrastination are procrastinators themselves? irony at its best...

ps- did i mention chicka is a tornado? every time i clean up one mess, i turn around to find another!

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

auntie momma chicka

i'm an aunt! (or i guess more of a aunt-in-law?). dada chicka's sister had her baby yesterday! dad, mom and baby are all doing great. she was in labor since 4 that morning and had him around 2:43pm that afternoon. YIKES! a c-section, for the short-term, sounds better to me although that incision still bothers me sometimes...

little "o" weighed 7lbs 1oz and was 20inches long. now we just have to wait till the weekend to make the 8 hourish trip there. this is torture sitting here waiting to see him. i am not looking forward to the drive. chicka is the worst in her car seat. she despises it. hopefully she will nap some and let me rest.

i get so nervous about that darn drive it almost makes me sick. i get stressed out. the packing, the planning and the entertaining. ugh. at least we get to see a our new nephew! that is what is keeping me strong and keeping my head up high. maybe i might even get to poke my camera in his face. i have been itching to try our "new" camera on a precious newborn since we got it.  

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

shower

what is it about a *real* shower that makes everything tolerable?

every time i'm having a horrible "mommy" day and think "i can't take this anymore! how do people do this and not go crazy? i need five minutes to breathe!" i take a shower.

as i strip off my clothes of woe, worry and doubt of being a good mom and step into my five minutes of heaven and really take time to enjoy my shower. my mind wonders and my shoulders relax as the water washes away my guilt, stress and anxiety of the days troubles of a walking 10.5 month old. i scrub off the caked on teething biscuit and baby food along with the thoughts of second guessing my decisions and reactions of today's events. did i discipline her to hard when she chucked her sippy? did i not hug her long enough when she fell? does she know i really do love her? be gone cruel thoughts. move on and bother someone else. my shoulders relax...

as i step out of the shower and dry off and feel renewed. as i put on my mommy warrior clothes of sweats and t-shirts i think. "bring.it.on. i'm ready". and then my little chicka wakes from her slumber and i grab my mommy armor of boogie wipes, butt wipes, diapers and love. bring.it.on.
chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

caw-ap, j's birthday, planning

little chicka is becoming quite the little mimicker! she can now "talk" on the phone, "wash" the table, stir a big wooden spoon in an empty bowl to help "cook" and "read" a book! her newest is mimicking sounds. today in borders while reading the books we can't afford there was a book on clapping. i said "clap" and clapped my hands together. chicka clapped her hands clapped her hands and said "cap" then "caw-ap"! i was so stunned i must have made a funny face because she gave me the most concerned look. chicka is VERY perceptive! 1.5 months and she will be a one year old. sad times in momma chicka's heart. while i LOVE to watch her grow i hate admitting she is growing up. BOO.

had another birthday party this weekend. seems chicka's friends were born all around the same time because it's our 5th birthday in two months, geez. little "j" is the cutest little bleach blonde boy! mickey mouse was the theme and chicka was her normal social party animal.

when i first found out i was pregnant with chicka i planned on waiting til she turned 2 before even thinking of trying to conceive another one [preferably have our second when chicka is 3]. i wanted to give my full attention to chicka and didn't see the logic in having kids back to back. the closer chicka creeps to one the less i want to wait. i got the fever, baby fever that is. i'll be the first to admit it. not sure the hubbs is convinced in my logic [being ill will the baby fever] but we will have to see! i'm thinking it would make my day if we "pop" one out before chicka 2.5. if life only went as you planned it.

video

never put videos up but we will try it!

when chicka was a little, little [around 2 months]

playing in the water at the park

slurping noodlehead

that took way to long! any bloggers know an easier way?

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

snowball, what you've missed [along with picnik love] & that's MY daughter

soooo.... don't know where to begin. i'm mad at myself for letting me quit writing. it started with a week when adam was gone with business training and i was super tired. i let it go a couple of days. then a week. then 5. then it snowballed into months! sorry fans. if i still have any left! i will try to do my best into working on writing again... at least every other day.

chicka went from crawling at 9.5 months to walking just before 10 months. that's right, chicka is walking. the first step in rehab is admitting. my name is momma chicka and i'm a mother of a walker. yikes! she has become quite the drama queen! [not that i didn't know that already] she can say "moooo!", "wash" her hands [rubs them in a washing motion], point to the fish tank when you ask her "where's the fish?", squat down and up when you say "down" and "up" and many other things that i could brag about. she is quite the smarty pants!

since i KNOW me, i won't take that time to write in everything i want to that i happened since last i'm going to post a bunch of stuff to make up for it!

 went swiming

got new outfits

played with my dollies

learned how to make lots of new faces

had my first spaghetti dinner

learned how to walk

played at some parks

have you heard of a little thing called picnik? boy, i have become addicted to it! its i dumbed down free photo editing thing! i LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE it. that's possibly another reason i've stopped writing. on picnik instead! here's some of the things i have done:

whew. FINALLY, chicka had her first real hold-my-breath-til-i-pass-out temper tantrum!

tonight, chicka was exhausted. just finishing her bed time bath she was trying to run around naked. fine. i don't mind it one bit. then, she grab her pjs and was trying to walk with them but was tripping because they were dragging on the floor. okay, but she could hurt herself. then she wanted in the kitchen with the pjs. that's where we drew the line [no chicka of mine is entering the hard fake wood floor, slipping on her pjs and hitting her head]. either pj-less in the kitchen or living room with pjs in tow. she wanted in that kitchen pretty bad. she was trying to get around dada then through him. finally he took them away. and moved out of the way to let her through. nope, that was it. she wanted those pjs in that kitchen! now!

well, i scooped her up to lay her down. as long as she was crying i might as well get her ready for bed since she cries every time i try to de-nakify her. tears come out when the clothes go on. as i was laying her down she took in a HUGE breath. waiting for her normal 5-10 sec pause until a huge outburst i opened the diaper, put it under her, got the diaper cream out, slabbed it on and no scream...

adam came over. we both looked at each other, she was turning purple!...then her eyes glazed over...then she went limp for 10-15 seconds...then she "came to". she looked so scared. i didn't even no what to do! she looked frantic and was now crying because she didn't now what had happened. i hugged her tightly. within 10 minutes she was asleep.

i would be super frantic and upset if i had no idea what had just happened but i did this when i was little and so did my dad. when she was born i feared she might get this trait along with the other kooky things she already got [like a huge monkey gap between the first and second toe and a tailbone dimple]. i was not so excited when she did this. looks like i've passed down another great tradition. called my mom and she laughed and told me to nip it in the butt before its gets to hard to break. she coddled me and caved which made me do it more to get what i want. chicka is just past 10 months!
ah, not already!  yep, that's MY daughter.

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

number two & classic

chicka was a little more crabby today. i guessed it was revenge getting me because i bragged that she wasn't crabby at all. as the day progressed it got worse. as i was feeding her dinner i saw something odd. tooth number two is poking through! poor chicka, not one but two teeth at once!


i probably just had one of my top three most embarrassing moments of my life! i have this fear since i'm kind of goofy, awkward and unusually happy that people think i'm not smart. okay here it goes:

i'm at the gas station. i want three things: gas, bottled water, one bill. i don't want to pay outside at the pump, go inside and pay again for water. i hit "pay inside", which i've never done, and it says authorizing. soon a woman's voice come over the intercom above me and says "mam, this is a pre-pay station. you need to either come inside and pay first or pay outside". "fine", i thought, "forget the water, i just want gas." i tried to cancel it but it wouldn't go. again the woman's voice comes on the intercom, "MAM, it's a pre-pay only, you need to come in and pay or pay now outside." i yelled as if she could hear me, "i'm trying!". i close my gas cap and head inside.

i tried to explain the woman behind the counter that i want one bill that has water and gas. she had a different voice than the intercom woman and told me the exact same thing, pay-first either inside or out. i could see i was getting nowhere. i wanted someone to explain how to pay now INSIDE. the intercom woman comes to me and asks if i wanted her to come outside and help me. i thought "no, i know how to pump gas!"

she started walking out the door. i followed her and tried to explain that i couldn't cancel it out. when we got there it had timed out and was at the beginning screen. she started pushing buttons and showing me how to pump gas in a sing-song voice [making me feel incompetent]. she then set it up and walked away...

i hit the grade, pulled the nozzle out of its holder and turned towards my car. my gas cap and lid were closed! [my car has a lever inside that you have pull to unlock the lid] crap, i can't put the nozzle back in the holder because it might cancel it out. i set it in on the ground, run around to the driver door, get in, pull the lever, and ran back. by this time it had timed out and it read "please see cashier". sh*t, i'm not going back in there. i looked towards the store and see the lady standing in the doorway staring at me! omgoodness, has she been watching me the whole time? did she see me set the nozzle on the ground and run around and get into my car?!

CANCEL! CANCEL! CANCEL! i hit. it finally cancels. as i'm holding the nozzle, i do it for the third time. i finally get to the "remove nozzle" stage. it won't go past that stage because i already had it in my hand before i started! it doesn't realize i already removed it. what do i do?! i look over and she is STILL staring at me!!!! i ram the nozzle into the holder and yank it back out so fast if you would have blinked you would have missed it... whew, it says "pick a grade". i pick the grade, cram the nozzle into the tank, turn my back away from intercom lady and pray for this ordeal to be over with. the gas could not fill fast enough. taping my toes and about to cry i yank it out as soon as it stops, run to my car and i swear i left black tire marks when i took off!

i can laugh now but i was two seconds from crying. classic. here's a clip of me in 40 years! [sorry it has ads]  i will, but i don't ever want to go back there again. long story and thanks for reading!

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

disappearing act, daddy's gone & that guy

chicka's tooth is officially m.i.a.! i continually bugged her to open her tiny mouth and when i finally got a peak i noticed it had worked its way back down. booger. i can barely see it. what a mean and stubborn tooth. i outta give it a piece of my mind. i hope it works its way back up for good because i'm sure its agonizingly painful for chicka even though she doesn't act like it.

dada chicka is at training all this week and this makes me sad. its only the second time since chicka was born that he has been gone and i'm glad for that. last time it was in our home state and i got to spend that week with my parents. luckily this time, i get to stay with some relatives that live close by until he returns on friday. oh what a long week this will be because i never sleep good when he's gone because i love cuddling! a little too much in fact. i'm such a heater too and i'm sure dada is dying from heat and secretly trying to get away from me but its the only way i can get to sleep anymore. guess my pillow will be my new cuddle buddy for the week. if only it gave hugs and back rubs!

what is it that makes "guy" smelling stuff so hypnotizing?! i swear you give me a bottle of good cologne and i'm like a teenager with a sharpie, i will smell it til i can't see straight! i secretly and occasionally wash my hair with my husband's manly shampoo and use his pit stick just to so i can smell it all day. i'm weird and i'll be the first to admit it but i can't understand why i'm a junkie for the stuff.

every good thing has a downside: don't be that guy.

the guy that reeks of older gentlemen cologne that gets in my nose and won't get out. it turns me off. it doesn't matter how cute you are that guy. ladies, you know him.

don't use too much. if i can smell you upwind and outside from five feet away, its too much. every guy i've ever known that does that is sideways ball cap wearing d**che bag. ya, that guy.

don't be that guy that douses his car with it so when i get in i pray that its nice enough to keep the windows down, its a turn off. i don't need to be attracted to your car! on you is enough thank you.

be this guy:

spray just enough that i can smell it indoors when i pass you. i WILL do a double take, EVERY time. once, this guy must have known i caught a whiff because he turned around and saw my "afterglow". i was mortified.

put it somewhere unexpected, no NOT down there. like your hair. once, this guy at best buy bent down to get something on the bottom shelf to show me and he must have put it in his hair because the motion released the scent and it made me lean in a little too close [and i closed my eyes, yum] when he started to stand back up his head almost hit my face!

you get what you pay for. cheap cologne smells cheap and like alcohol. please invest it in. a little goes a loooong way. it might even make you feel like you look like this guy.

thanks for reading.

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...

awake at 5 am & tree pose

this morning i randomly awoke without the crying out of my little one. confused i glanced at the clock. 5 am! chicka had not waken up all night! was i dreaming?! of course i ran to check on her... still passed out. i laid back down giddy and wide awake from proud momma syndrome. around 5:30 i heard her began to stir. a very soft lazy cry came from her room. i ran in, popped her paci back in and crossed my fingers. she finally woke up around 6:30! chicka,  my chicka, you did it. i'm so proud. here's a pic of chicka with snacks in her hair, she was an absolute mess right before church. she really needed a bath!

this morning before church we were hanging around outside since it was sooo nice out [compared to the normal 100+ degree temperatures we've been facing]. as i was letting chicka walk with my help she started to head towards the grass. her last encounter was NOT successful. she cried and demanded to be picked up refusing to touch her feet down. worried about ruining her good mood i cautiously let her adventure to the yard. putting one foot on the grass, chicka looked up for encouragement, thought about the second foot and decided it was a no go. chicka was stuck because she couldn't step back since her step forward was so huge. she would not put her other foot down for anything! it was too precious. what's a girl to do? she went into tree pose to save her other foot. sunshine from sunshine family yoga would be so proud! made dada run in and grab the canera to take some quick pictures before she got to upset!

chicka chicka boom boom, i'll write again real soon...